Will you have any time off in the next few days to just relax and get some sleep? I realize that even if you do have the time, sleep might not easily come. But maybe you can take a day or two off from work to rest. I'm sure you have already thought of this, but just in case I thought I'd suggest it.

I have Sunday off. Thank the Lord above. Scott and I are going to a Detroit Lions football game (my first LIVE football game ever!)

He got me the tickets for my bday on the 2nd. I am excited.

Today was supposed to be my day off from PetSmart, but I volunteered to work the entire day by myself as assistant at the dental office.

lol. 2 things: 1. the football game sounds awesome and really fun. 2. you are too nice. You should just have said no to working on your day off. It sounds like you are wearing yourself way too thin. Plus working by yourself had to have been hard. Sleep in Sunday morning and have lots of fun at the game. Plus, you will have some good quality time with your hubbie to be! Win-win

I noticed that on your wt-watchers post, you stated that you are addicted to diet cherry coke - that stuff has tons of caffeine in it; if you are drinking coffee, too, then this could be contributing to your wrestless nights. Could you wean yourself off the caff? Should stress that you should go off of it gradually, otherwise you can get those awful caffeine withdrawal headaches. If you must have your soda, would it be possible to drink it only in the morning? Caffeine has a tendancy to stimulate and then depress - it's kinda like sugar in that respect. You've got a lot on your plate, young lady - a wedding, your fiance's new job, new schedule, you've changed majors and have a job in a different field...you have got to find some time to rest - otherwise your keet-babies will have to take care of you...I'm picturing the three of them perching on your face and regurgitating wet slimey seeds into your mouth - just takin care of mommy - made you laff??? . Now go to bed - it's past your bedtime!!! :]

I know I should have, but I need the money and I worked at that office as an assistant for 4 years full time. I love it there (most of the time)

This is why Scott is trying to let me not work at PetSmart. I am so tired and I dont really enjoy that job. I would be much happier without it.

Lol, Diet Wild Cherry Pepsi! Its soooo yummy. I only drink it before 12 noon, so that cant be the problem with my sleeping. I drink coffee... Maybe 2 times a week? Always early. I know if I drink it too late I wont sleep.

The weird thing is even though Scott falls asleep on the couch alot, and its really hard for me to sleep right next to him in bed due to his snoring... If he isnt HERE, in the apartment I just CANT sleep.

Well, I meant he USED to fall asleep on the couch and I would sleep in the bed. Now hes at work at night. Not even on the couch, snoring like I am used to.

*Cry

depression is a horrible feeling and it feels like the end. Iam sorry you feel this way. everyone at some point has a touch of depression, but when it a person is actually diagnosed with depression I could not tell you.
I used to be a violent person from my depression. After taking zoloft for 6 months and at a high level, I have not been like that anymore. I still get depressed sometimes, but I am just thankful not to get violent. My violent outbreaks were not major to the point of weapons, but I would slap and kick. I am glad not to be that person anymore.
I am not a religious person, but I do pray everynite to ask for strength. Without the strength from a higher being, it is impossible. Whatever your beliefs are, you can use those to help you.
I know it is hard, and things are really easier said than done.

Are there any friends or family that you can ever spend the night with or them stay with you? Whenever my husband worked at night, I would sometimes spend the night with my mother.

I will pray for you.

aw - you're just like my baby girl, Emily - she's still my baby even tho' she's 29 yrs of age. She can't sleep without her husband there beside her either. The fact that you and Scott have such a strong foundation should make you feel very proud. Do you know how many people would envy you for what you have? I'm divorced after 27 yrs of marriage - I know I would give anything to have what you have .

I wish I could spend the night with my momma, but this apartment and this bed is my home now. It smells like Scott, so I have been making a mound out of pillows on his side of the bed that I can sleep against. I have also been wearing his shirts, etc. to bed.

Wow, I should like a loser...