Pull, Buddy

An out-of-towner drove his car into a ditch in a desolated area. Luckily, a local farmer came to help with his big strong horse, named Buddy. He hitched Buddy up to the car and yelled, "Pull, Nellie, pull!" Buddy didn't move.

Then the farmer hollered, "Pull, Buster, pull!" Buddy didn't respond.

Once more the farmer commanded, "Pull, Coco, pull!" Nothing.

Then the farmer nonchalantly said, "Pull, Buddy, pull!" And the horse easily dragged the car out of the ditch.

The motorist was most appreciative and very curious. He asked the farmer why he called his horse by the wrong name three times.

The farmer said, "Oh, Buddy is blind and if he thought he was the only one pulling, he wouldn't even try."

How To Save Your ***


The pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won. The pastor was so pleased with the donkey that he entered it in the race again, and it won again.

The next day, the local paper read: PASTOR'S *** OUT FRONT.

The Bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity that he ordered the pastor not to enter the donkey in another race.

The next day, the local paper headline read: BISHOP SCRATCHES PASTOR'S ***.

This was too much for the bishop, so he ordered the pastor to get rid of the donkey. The pastor decided to give it to a nun in a nearby convent.

The local paper, hearing of the news, posted the following headline the next day: NUN HAS BEST *** IN TOWN.

The bishop fainted. He informed the nun that she would have to get rid of the donkey. So she sold it to a farmer for $10.

The next day the paper read: NUN SELLS *** FOR $10!

This was too much for the bishop, so he ordered the nun to buy back the donkey and lead it to the plains where it could run wild.

The next day the headlines read: NUN ANNOUNCES HER *** IS WILD AND FREE!!
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The bishop was buried the next day.

I know this was far back...
but i dont get the bull and peppermint one @.@

Heres one: (beware of racism)
There were three men of different ethnicities working on constructing a building.
One day, the Indian said, "I'm so sick of curry!If i get curry again for lunch, I will jump off this building."
The Italian man said, "Me too! If I get pasta again for lunch, I will jump off this building." The blonde man also groaned, "I
am so sick of peanut butter an jelly sandwiches, If I get another one, I will commit suicide."
So the next day the Indian screamed, "Augh! Curry!" an jumped off the roof.
The Italian yell, "Oh no! Spaghetti!" and jumped off and died.
The blonde cried, "Noooo! P and J!" and did the same.
At the three men's funeral, the Indian's wife sobbed, "If I had known he hated curry, I wouldn't have made it!"
The Italian's wife said, "It's all my fault! I idnt know he disliked pasta."
But the blonde's wife shrugged and said,
"I wouldn't know why he killed himself, he always made his own lunch."

coolness test
Coolness Test

This test is based on how cool you were in High School --what
crowd you ran with, etc., but it's still pretty accurate.

You may want to send it to your friends to see if they've changed.

SEE IF YOU ARE A STILL A COOL PERSON:

http://www.sailinganarchy.com/general/2002/cool_test.htm

Sent that link to everyone I know!!!!

One night, an 87-year-old woman came home from
>> Bingo to find her
>> 92-year-old husband in bed with another woman.
>> She became violent and ended
>> up pushing him off the balcony of their 20th
>> floor apartment, killing him
>> instantly. Brought before the court, on the
>> charge of murder, she was asked
>> if she had anything to say in her own defense.
>>
>> "Your Honor," she began coolly, "I figured that
>> at 92, if he could screw,
>> he could fly."

lol

lol

sorry